“I’m going to make breakfast in the morning. Please come by. Can I call in AM?”
Kinda gives you the creeps, huh? Above is an actual text message I received at 2:20 AM this morning. Texts such as these are the result of a lethal combination of too much booze and a friend that hands your number out to any guy that seems interested (Love ya anyways!!!) Unfortunately for Emeril Lagasse I wasn’t able to make breakfast this morning. As a matter of fact I slept through that meal entirely and headed directly to lunch town.
I’ve said on more than one occasion that all cell phones need to come equipped with a device that activates at 11:00 PM each night. This device will then ask you if you really think it’s a good idea to send that? I mean, really? The later it becomes the more insistent said device will become and will tell you that to send that text (Hi! Me drunkey-where u?) is a bad call. Any texts attempted to be sent after two AM will be held in a queue for review in the morning. The amount of anxiety this would prevent would be immeasarable. Imagine never having to scroll through your phone again and get that sinking sensation when you stumble across a sent text, “Wasted now. You come over?” This same device will not permit any outgoing calls to be made more than once. You will never have to go through your sent calls and see you called the same person six times in a row in a span of five minutes.
I think I’m going to patent this idea and start marketing it ASAP. This could be my ticket outta here!!!