TGIF y’all. It’s time to reach into the reader mailbag and answer another one of your questions. Keep ‘em coming!
Dear Café Darkness:
I hate your blog but I can’t stop reading it. What’s wrong me with me and what do I do?
Sincerely,
Love to Hate you in Chesterfield
Dear Love to Hate:
This is quite the conundrum. One the one hand we totally get it. You hate us but yet feel compelled to read this on the regular. We also love to hate stuff. Jon & Kate Plus Eight, Scientology and Sarah Palin all come to mind.
Another possibility is that you may be touched in the head, bless your heart. Richard Nixon is not actually in your house wearing a one-shouldered beaded Versace evening gown singing show tunes and manhandling you if you do not read Café Darkness on the hour. But if he is, can we get the name of the guy who sells you pot?
The most practical solution we can offer is to remind you that you CAN shut down your internets and actually go mingle with some human beings. We know you can do it! You won’t be banned from World of Warcraft forever if you leave it for a bit. For example, instead of reading this, you could have an ice cream social or throw a Color Me Pretty Party. Go rollerblading. Learn Cantonese.
Your options are endless. So please, go. Go live your life. Leave us now. Or stay.
We still love you just like Jesus does,
The Lone Wolf & Barista
Café Darkness 
You should edit that to say “teched” in the head, like my grandma used to say. That’s the Appalachian way of saying ‘not quite right’.
Just discovered you this a.m. from TCG shoutout–have to say, love it so far!
sorry, should be ‘TETCHED’–someone who is off balance or mentally touched. 🙂