Are you there, God? It’s me, TLW. Hey listen, I know you’ve been super busy lately with all the celebrity deaths (Billy Mays! Why?!) and all but I was wondering if maybe you could make it so Tsaur could stop coming into work 45 minutes early every day? See the thing is the main reason I come in at seven thirty is so I have an hour of T free time a day and lately he’s been coming in at like 7:45. I hate it so bad? Plus also I’m barely getting here before him which is also cramping my style. I consider 7:30 more of a goal I shoot for rather than hard “start time”.
One more thing, too, God. And again, I know you’re dealing with the Iranian election and that whole thing but if you could maybe make him stop cc-ing me on every goddamn (whoops, sorry God!) email he sends that would be great, too. I hate coming back to work from a long weekend and having 55 unread irrelevant emails from him.
I hate him, God. I really, really do but I understand we all have our crosses to bear and Tsaur is mine. Thanks in advance-I really appreciate it!