What a week this has been! Holy smokes y’all I’m exhausted and it’s not even Friday night yet. Let’s review some of the highlights for the week of August 2-8:
T Saur’s getting laid on the regs. This angers and disgusts me. He sexed his lady on the balcony of his apartment this week. All visitors to Cha Cha’s, Europa and Hard Shell-you’ve been warned. One can only assume that his constant throat clearing doesn’t stop when he’s at work youknowwhatimsayin?
Happy Birthday Barista! She turned the big 3-0 with dignity, grace and woo woos. She’s even got her first hangover in her 30s under her belt. Congrats!
The Watermelon Festival is this weekend. It never ceases to amaze me that people actually enjoy this event and attend it on their own accord. I would rather perform my own lobotomy with a dull butter knife than rub elbows with 100,000 other sweaty Richmonders and their strollers the size of a double wide.
Twitter went down yesterday and in case you didn’t hear trillions of people were unable to communicate the minutia of their lives.
The celebrity deaths keep on comin. RIP John Hughes. Teen angst in the 80’s at its best.
When a hipster asks you if you are jealous of his whiskey simply nod and reply “Of course I am”.
This is the first five day work week I’ve worked since April. No worries though. I’ve internetted and dicked around for a solid 9 hours this week while on the company dime to balance out the scales of justice.