Happy Hump Day everyone! It’s Wednesday all day long and you know what that means. It’s time for some random ditties that I don’t think deserve their own post because otherwise I would have already written one about them!
One would think that upon meeting the son of a former executive of Steal Your Soul, Inc that perhaps I should put on my “happy face”, make nice nice and “network”. Of course I decide to take a hard left and request that he please ask his father to stop stealing my money. Then I told him that the re org was truly an evil genius plan to hook up all the white dudes of Steal Your Soul, Inc and I give respect where it’s due. He seemed a little taken aback but apparently he thought it was hot since we made out in the parking lot afterwards. God I am so classy!
I think my Security Guard boyfriend is ready to take things to the next level. Last week he gave me a tomato (Hanover!) he grew in his garden and yesterday he offered me a ride in his pick up truck. I thought that 70 was a little old for me but current events lead to me to believe that I was wrong! We’re totally going to get married and I’m going to put my uterus to good work and make a million trillion little Security Guard/TLW babies!
Where’s Barista? She’s in a training class, that’s where! (Hopefully she’ll be back to working on this blog as early as tomorrow since I’ve been working overtime over here! Hint, hint there, B!) As luck would have it she’s in the same class with a guy a hooked it with for a hot sec back in January. I asked her to please let him know that he’s going to be a daddy in a month and that I’m registered at Babies R Us if he’s interested in buying the baby a gift? She could snap a pic of his face when she drops that bomb and it would be the most rad thing evah. I don’t think she’ll do it -but if she does then woo woos on me for the rest of the year!
T Saur told me yesterday that “we have a lot in common” since we’re both single and making sexy. I told him to shut his mouth when he was talking to me and to never utter those words again. I also reminded him that everyone makes sexy and this is not some special bond that the two of us share and that “me” “T Saur” and “making sexy” should never be in the same sentence ever again. Then I had to excuse myself to give my lunch back.