Top 5 Reasons I hate the cold!

Chuckles, one of my 24  semi-feral cats, also dislikes the cold weather even with a jaunty little sweater!
Chuckles, one of my 24 semi-feral cats, also dislikes the cold weather even with a jaunty little sweater!

Call me crazy but the fact that I haven’t seen the sun in about a week and it’s cold as a mother outside in mid-October leads me to believe this could be a hell of a winter.  I really hate cold weather.  I hate people who enjoy cold weather even more than the cold weather itself.  I have a feeling that the same people who enjoy cold weather are the same people who back into parking spaces, but I digress.  Below are my top five reasons I hate winter:


1-Dark in the morning/Dark at night.  I wake up and it’s dark outside, I go to work when the sun is out and then by the time I leave work it’s dark again.  Perpetual darkness is not my cup of tea. I like to feel that I have a life outside of work..  Who enjoys this besides vampires? Something else I’m over? Vampires.  So 2008.  I’ll tell you who enjoys it- the same people who get jazzed about Law and Order marathons on a Friday night-that’s who.


2-Walking the boys.  People who like winter obviously do not have dogs they walk at six AM when it’s 32 degrees outside because if they did then they would shut their god damn mouths about how they, “just love the crisp, cold weather”.  Bitch-I’ll cut you, I swear to God. I can’t feel my god damn hands! It’s cold! Shit!  


3-Pale like whoa! Back in Victorian England a sign of beauty was to have the palest skin possible. I would have been the prettiest gal around town!


4-Layering up! I’m sorry but jackets suck balls.  Driving with a jacket on makes me feel like I’m getting a perpetual hug from someone I despise.  Also a stain is going out and having to lug a jacket around all night. You can’t leave it at home because you’ll freeze but then you’re stuck just standing at the bar with a five pound wool jacket slung over your arm all night.  Nice.


5-People talking about snow storms.  

Note: I recognize the irony of this statement in a post soley related to the weather. I just really hate being cold. 

Personally I don’t “get” talking about the weather. It’s the weather. What else is there to say? It’s hot, it’s cold, it’s raining, it’s sunny.  Whatever-who cares? There’s nothing you can do about it so why are we wasting our time here?  Richmonders go absolutely bananas at the mere hint of inclement weather.  In turn, local news gets equally out of control and covers the WEATHER like it’s the Cuban Missile Crisis.  Yes, it snowed a ¼ inch last night. School is cancelled for a fortnight.  Neat.  Can we talk about something that actually matters (like anything else going on in the world) for a hot sec and break away from doing snow angels on the side of Midlothian Turnpike? Thanks!


18 thoughts on “Top 5 Reasons I hate the cold!

  1. I bet that when you are not home, Chuckles the semi-feral cat checks the weather forecast on NBC 12. That way he knows if he’ll be wearing another stylish sweater tomorrow.
    Andrew Freiden

  2. TLW and B are also huge NBC 12 fans. I’m not sure how many other local writers have the NBC 12 weather blog linked to their sites.

    Just tell me when it’s cold enough to switch up my merlot for a few fingers of bourbon.

  3. I hope that really is your cat bc that photo is awesome.

    I agree with you on all of your cold-weather hate. I’ve slept in the living room the last 4 nights bc my bedroom is not insulated (thanks 1930’s building!) and it’s too G-D cold.

    I actually quite like talking about the weather. I know that Richmonders exaggerate any weather and so I like to go full in with the ridiculousness and talk about it more. Especially with co workers. It’s the one thing we all have in common. Even you and T-Saur (scandal!).

    1. You know, I have often been curious as to the exact nature of TLW’s fascination with T-Saur… Her detail-laden descriptions and complete internalization of his every move both seem to evoke a familiarity that one might describe as being in the direction of the L-word…

  4. im not from richmond – im in WV but just wanted to comiserate! last year i spent the winter in northern Iowa for work — how i longed for 30 degree temperatures. the only thing i hated worse than the below zero temps everyday were the people who acted like it was no big deal!!! did you know you get a fine in iowa for not shoveling your walk? thats right every day at 3 or 4 am people would be out there shoveling or snow blowing. thats a nice way to wake up everyday!! the snow never melts!!! it snowed in november and i never saw the ground again till march!! the dont bother plowing the roads because the snow would just wind up in massive piles in peoples yards. it just gets packed down over and over till its a 6 inch thick piece of ice – then in march it starts to break up making massive pot holes in the ice that tear your car up!!! for about 2 weeks solid the wind chill was 57 below zero, white out conditions everyday as the snow would blow and blow across the roads from the barren corn fields. when i would show up 5 or 10 minutes late because i had to shovel out my sweet compact front wheel drive compact rental that was usually frozen shut by the way – they acted like oh yeah – you gotta get up 2 hours early in the winter so you can shovel and get to work on time – its normal…… i could go on and on…. i went home in Feb to visit and it was 25 degrees and snowing – they said – oh you can back on the coldest day of the year– i felt like i didnt even need a jacket… i would look at the weather channel and long for 30 to 35 degrees……

  5. THANK YOU! It is currently freezing in the UK and everyone pops on their woolly hats and goes about their business. Everyone except me, I HATE the cold, I cant function, my fingers don’t work properly, it makes me unbelievably grumpy and a little bit sad that its dark all the time 😦 Im just glad you understand, and carrying a heavy coat around a bar really does cramp your style….

  6. I’m so in this with you. I always get a cold during winter – I FREAKING HATE COLD WEATHER. AND I’M CANADIAN. GOD HELP ME.

    Also, your cat looks achingly similar to mine. Though he has an infinitely cuter sweater!

  7. I like your post. I’m stuck up here in Michigan’s upper peninsula for college. It sucks. I’ve lived in Michigan since 2001 and have hated every minute of it. It was -20 today! A cold, nasty hell this place is. And I totally agree. I swear these idiots only show signs of a pulse when they hear that its going to snow. I thought they just won the lotto. Only losers enjoy the cold weather, especially somewhere like here where it stays cold even in May. I feel lifeless in the cold. Its boring and has sooo many disadvantages. If I hear someone else say how much they love the cold weather I’m going choke them. (not really but I want to)..Good post

    1. IDK how u live up there the up is the most depressing boring place in the world they need to turn it into one big national park or make michigan into two states North Michigan & South Michigan

  8. Well i can not STAND the winter and I’m from SW Michigan we get some of the coldest and worst winters in the US mainly because were right off the east coast of Lake Michigan so i cant wait to move down to the big TX (Texas)

  9. youre messed up to be feeding 20+ ferla cats that are destroying the local ecosystem. they should be taken care of in a different manner F== x

  10. Well said. The cold sucks.
    I even hate it when it’s cold indoors. I hate it when the AC is on 60. I hate that temperature. I like to just feel fresh or warm-ish, normal. And if it’s too hot… 😀 pool and beaches sound just about right. ^^

  11. I’m late to the party but so with you! I love your post and agree with pretty much all of it. The paleness thing doesn’t really bother me either way, but the rest is spot on!

    You’re so right. The only thing worse than cold weather is people who love cold weather all the crazy reasons they love it!

    Why does everyone call cold weather “crisp”? That makes no sense. Cold weather feels awful. I don’t enjoy having numb toes, fingers, ears, and lips. My nose gets runny even if I’m not sick. My muscles feel tense. I can’t stand to exercise outside in the winter because it hurts to breathe the air when it’s so cold and dry. “Crisp” is a word to describe apples and potato chips, not the weather!

    Also the part about coats suck. They’re heavy, they’re itchy, they create static in your hair and you end up shocking yourself any time you come within a foot of a metal surface.

    The dark too. It makes you feel so sluggish. I don’t usually get up early in the morning, but went out for something special at 7 AM the other day and was not tired at all because it was, GASP, light out! Humans just aren’t meant to spend all their time in the dark.

    I love summer. The air is thick and alive. You can feel everything. You’re energized. You can wear lighter clothes that breathe instead of being confined in sweaters and long sleeves. And when it starts getting too hot an afternoon rain comes in and cools things down. Perfect weather, IMO.

  12. I live in Florida and despise the hot weather 100% of the time——-except when it gets the slightest bit chilly. Its 4am and 55 degrees F here, and I’m freezing because I just had to take my dogs outside! The cold weather instantly causes me to have amnesia about how horrible the stiflingly hot and humid weather is. It will get hot again during the day and I will be wishing for cold again. I can’t win. My favorite kind weather is crisp, not windy and sunny all at the same time, with the sun reflecting off the snow. (something I havent experienced for many years). I have 6 dogs and also have 17 both tame and feral cats. They also hate the hot weather and are comatose most of the year, but come to life when the weather is cool. “I’ll cut you bitch: is HYSTERICAL. lol!

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