I hear wedding bells!

I love to hate on one of my friends on Facespace.  We went to high school together and she is getting married on Saturday.  In case you forget she’s getting married she reminds you every single day via her status update.  Now before you ask me why I bother to read it when I know it’s going to iritate me, I kindly ask you to shut your mouth when you’re talking to me.  This girl’s wedding is my own Jon Gosselin. I can’t not look!

I honestly have no idea what she’s going to talk about after the wedding, but maybe we’ll all luck out and she’ll get knocked up on her honeymoon.  I’ve been married and I really don’t remember being that excited about the whole process but hey, maybe that was part of the problem? Hello!  Anywhoos, below is a sampling of her status updates.  Beside each is what I wish I could have said, but did not, but wish I had because that would totally and completely badass. 

is excited for my lingerie shower today! Ew, that’s gross.

is soooo over all this wedding hooplah. I am ready for the Honeymoon!! That makes two of us.

is picking out my wedding portrait today. Too many beautiful pics…how will I choose! 😉 Pick the one where you talk about your wedding the least!  Also, you should have ended that sentence with a question mark as it is not a declarative statement!  

Got my marriage license this morning. I think I might be officially married??? 🙂 Wrong again!

is excited about my bachelorette dinner at The Melting Pot tonight with the ladies! 😉 Nothing like a little fondue with the ladies to get me ready for a rock n roll night out on the town.

19 days….I can’t wait to wear my wedding gown! :0) Hey, I’ve gone ahead and decided to put myself in a medically-induced coma for the next 19 days. Wake me up after the Big Day!

is getting hitched 2 weeks from today! 🙂 It can’t come soon enough!

13 days. Oh. My. God.

Single digits…..9 days Thank you Jesus!

This is my last weekend as a single lady! 🙂 I went ahead and took down your “massage” ad from Craigslist today. I know you’re super busy with the wedding and just wanted to help out. You’re welcome!

is doing a practice run on my bridal makeup. 🙂  You can not even be serious with these updates. 

IT’S MY WEDDING WEEK! I’M GETTING MARRIED ON SATURDAY! 5 DAYS….HOLLA!  YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW EXCITED I AM!

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4 thoughts on “I hear wedding bells!

  1. I am glad to see I’m not the only one who thinks snarky things about what her friends post sometimes. Twitter is especially bad for this.

    Those updates ARE annoying. I’m surprised you haven’t hidden her on your feed yet.

  2. You know my thoughts – in general there is a direct correlation that lines up to the more bananas a girl is over her “wedding” (note difference between wedding and marriage) the less bananas she is about her hubby to be.

  3. i have a few friends on facespace who i had to just give up and block the status updates. i really wish facespace would put a limit, like maybe one update per week. some people are just so off the charts with that bonkers update shit. i can’t handle it.

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