I am proud to present to you the winner of the Most Awesome Cover Letter of 2009 contest, Mr. Billy Bobby Ray Bobbins Jr. (not his real name, but close).
Mr. Bobbins Jr. was contacted about the honor, but refuses to accept his award as he believes that the government will find a way to “tax his ass real good” on the acrylic plaque Cafe Darkness offered him.
I have the skill set and clean record you desire. I worked as a [totally unrelated, in no way relevant job] and then I took a year off.
Billy Bobby Ray Bobbins Jr.
PS – I expect to be called when someone else did not, or will not make it in. For 1 year, 4 day and 8 hours, I showed up, sober and ready to work. Non-smoker, looking for full-time work.