It’s funny being off of work for an extended period of time. You learn-quickly-just how much better life is when you are not sitting in a drab office surrounded by people you can’t stand whilst listening to the air flow through the vents.
This past Saturday I realized with a sinking feeling that it was the end of my Christmas vacation. The mere thought of returning to work ruined my Saturday night. Saturday I was mad. Sunday I was sad. Today I am resigned. I knew I would be entering a shit storm today. I expected and have encountered the following:
T Saur unnecessarily cc-ing me on pointless e-mails, most of which started with “FYI”: 120. Please note all 120 emails go directly in the trash can. I don’t care about anything that happened when I was gone.
Angry voicemails from old people bitching that I was on vacation: 5
High importance e-mails that I summarily dismissed because I am going to assume the situation resolved itself: 3
Amount of time it took for my manager to “knock” on my cube informing me of different tasks “we” (read-me) needed to accomplish today upon her arrival at work: 3.5 seconds.
Number of times I cursed before 9 AM: 45
People I have been forced to make awkward “how did you spend your holidays” chit chat with: 6.
Number of times Barista made me laugh out loud at e-mails she has sent today to people being nasty: 1.
I also managed to avoid having to directly look at T Saur until 10:35 AM at which point he informed me he went on a date with a “real nice girl” over the break. They went to the T.G.I Friday’s. I think 2010 is going to be a-okay.