Virginia’s Gay Population: We Live Our Life, You Live Yours

One of many restaurants that are "just fine" .

 

RICHMOND, VA.  In light of recent events occurring in and around the Commonwealth, Virginia’s Homosexual Alliance (VHA) released a press statement yesterday asking everyone to, “please leave us the hell alone.”  Last week’s visit from Westboro Baptist Church coupled with Attorney General Ken Cuncinelli’s refusal to include language in the state’s anti-discrimination policies baring discrimination based on sexual orientation was the breaking point for the state’s gay, lesbian and transgendered organization.   

Speaking from his Fan home, VHA spokesman Ed Smith reiterated the organization’s previous pleas to be left the fuck alone for one god damn second.  “We implore you to please go back to your own mind-numbingly boring lives. We do not care that you make a day out of going to Bed, Bath and Beyond and eat at Applebee’s even though it’s really, really gross.  Why do you care who we make the sexy with?”  In an attempt to show how he, and every other Virginia LGBT citizen could give a rat’s ass about their lives he  stated that one time when en route from Richmond to DC he even went so far as to stop at a Cracker Barrel because he was, “super hungry and it looked like everything else was closed.”  “It was a fine meal”, he added.  

Although the group’s statement specifically asks for everyone to focus on their own shortcomings for the love of Baby Jesus instead of finding fault with everyone else who may be just a little bit different from themselves thus forcing them to question their own life choices, researchers believe that people minding their own business will not stop any time soon.

6 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by DirButtLicking on March 9, 2010 at 11:52 pm

    The gays are seriously sassed out.

    Reply

  2. Posted by Meade on March 13, 2010 at 12:19 am

    I dont mind the gays. Just dont force the government to support it. They can listen to their Cher records to their hearts content. And Cracker Barrell really is good. I never eat at Applebee’s!

    Reply

  3. [...] Virginia’s Gay Population: We Live Our Life, You Live Yours « Café Darkness [...]

    Reply

  4. Posted by Nathan Hale on March 17, 2010 at 7:29 pm

    Adolf Hitler started somewhere with one…..then two….then three……utilizing hatred to eventually
    justify the slaughter of millions of people who were “different”……without blue eyes, blonde hair…..
    without whatever it was he was for.

    Our new Governor and Lieutenant Governor are off to a good start, following in his footsteps.
    and they have the Virginia Taxpayers to pay their bills………

    Eventually, millions of our children were required to expend their lives in wars to teach him
    some manners………and temporarily persuade him……

    Gays and Lesbians, if they stick to their guns, will bring far less un-wanted and un-cared
    for children into the world than our straight, fouled up, Christians, turned out by Pat Robertson’s
    group, who think the missionary position is the only way to go.

    Reply

  5. Thanks a lot for this post. We should all live our lives to the fullest extent.

    Reply

  6. Posted by Barbara on February 3, 2012 at 9:01 am

    It’s not like gays and lesbians are going to procreate. Let people do what they want in private. Nature doesn’t allow two of the same sex to reproduce, I don’t know why and neither do you. Is homosexuality natural in that respect? Obviously not. Do some people prefer sex with their own sex? Obviously so. Is it against God? Let God do the judging, it’s not your call or mine. Man’s law? It’s always been majority rule. Is that right? That’s why we vote in a democracy.

    Reply

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