It’s a Boy!

Billy Mays II and Slap Chop!

 Barista is proud to announce the birth of Vince “Slap Chop” Shlomi at 7:04 pm on March 17, 2010.  Slap Chop weighed in at a healthy 6 oz and 169 grams, with a 3.7 inch colorful display and 385 minutes of battery life.

Named after Offer Vince Shlomi, the obvious successor of Billy Mays the spokesman,  Slap Chop  one day hopes to step out of Mays shadow and dominate the smart phone and as-seen-on-tv infomercial markets.  Slap Chop can already get on the internets as fast as Billy Mays II, and has a slide-out qwerty keyboard which Billy Mays II does not.  Slap Chop also does something supposedly awesome like run all sorts of applications at the same time while Billy Mays II cannot; however, no one including Barista can figure out what exactly is cool about that feature.  Slap Chop is a super awesome name, verb (slap chop = trust) and now also a drinking game which Barista and TLW will play for the next 8 months.  In conclusion, Slap Chop is every bit as fantabulous as Billy Mays II.  Beauty is in the web processor, right?
Slap Chop and Barista will call her mother as soon as they figure out how to use the phone.

5 thoughts on “It’s a Boy!

  1. For example:

    “I know it only cost 4 bones, but this wine is decent. Slap Chop.”

    “If one more person hit me with their baby stroller at the Irish Festival on Saturday, I was going to lose my shit. Slap Chop.”

  2. Strollers should be banned at the Irish Festival – get a damn carrier if your kid is too small to walk. Also, Droids are awesome.

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