RICHMOND, VA-Virginia Governor Bob McDonnell stunned the nation once again when he proclaimed April Confederate History Month earlier today. Ironically the Governor’s proclamation makes no mention of slavery which, when you think about it, makes absolutely zero fucking sense whatsoever.
When local African American community leaders were asked for their reaction they issued a statement saying the Civil War was, “kind of about owning black people, so no, we’re not cool with it”. They also asked if the Governor had, “some sort of reminder on his Outlook to do one batshit crazy thing per month” and warned the women of the Commonwealth to, “watch their backs because they’re totally getting it next.”
Those in McDonnell’s office said they were working on declaring other months to increase tourism to the state including, “Isn’t It Funny When Old White Men Say What You Can Do With Your Vagay May”, “Have you Hugged a Nazi Today June” and “Remember When We Sent Japanese People to Internment Camps- Oh Yeah That’s Right We Don’t Really Talk About That-Well Maybe We Should Do That Again July”.