Can I get a Unicorn? For TLW, “Yes We Can!”

I voted for him, too!

It’s been a minute since we served up some Wednesday Randoms so why not have it? Yes, I realize it’s Thursday but I took a knee and called in sick on Tuesday so it’s my Wednesday.  Let’s not split hairs, okay?

Speaking of calling in sick when you’re not, y’all should all do this. Immediately. It’s grand.  Sometimes happy hours continue a bit too late into the evening and, before you know it, it’s midnight and you’re still out on a school night!  Most of the time this is a non-issue and I just go to work tired and unproductive because I hate it here.  On Tuesday morning I debated going in and then remembered I haven’t gotten a raise since November 2007 and quickly decided against it.  Tuesday nap times! FTW!

We are now on week three of TSaur ignoring me.  These have been the best three weeks of my entire life since I started working in this shit hole.  However, worry not, readers! I still get the scoop on T’s love life via the coworkers he still pesters.  He’s got a big date tonight so watch out downtown, RVA. You may see T in his spiffy zip up cardigan and snazzy new hair cut romancing his new lady around town. Fist pump if you see him! (But really, don’t because then he won’t leave you alone.  Gross.) 

I am the clumsiest person I know.  Case in point: falling not once, but twice this past weekend. I’ll own Friday.  Red wine, Rumplemintz, tequila and brewskies do not a good combination make so when I tripped and fell walking home I definitely deserved it.  Saturday? Not so much. I was barely in my cups when skipping across Robinson St. I run into a parked car, somehow spin around in the air, mouth to my friends “I’m going to faaaaaaaaall” and proceed to skid across the street showing off my who-ha in the process. Always a trooper, this minor snafu did not make me tardy for the party and I continued about my business unfettered by my recently acquired scrapes.   

The Library of Congress recently announced their plans to archive every Tweet ever sent which begs the questions……..why?  No, I mean really? Have y’all been on Twitter? I mean,  I heart it.  There are some funny mofos on the Twitter and it’s a nice distraction when at work, but for serious? There’s no need to archive a bunch of people talking about how big of a slut your mom is and what their milkshake brings to the yard. Trust.

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