The one year anniversary of the King of Pop’s death is Friday but you know what? I don’t give a shit about that. Besides the fact that he was a freaky weirdo child molester who named his child Blanket (wtf is up with that), June 25th is my Special Divorce Day! Holler loudly, y’all. Yep, on Friday it will be one year to the day when I found out I was officially single again. Exciting. Anniversaries are great opportunities to reflect and see what’s changed in the past 365 days. Let’s take a looksie, shall we?
Career: Or should I say “career”? Same shit job with no prospects or plan of action of moving on to something better. There are days when I consider quitting my job, cashing out my 401(k) and moving to Costa Rica. Then I remember that’s crazy and that the BP Oil Spill will kill us all, so I just come in here and fantasize about the day I won’t be here anymore.
Dating: Blech. Zero improvement from this time last year with no one new on the horizon at this time. I will say this though, I’m a pro at attending various events solo including, but not limited to: weddings, funerals, Holiday gatherings, going away parties, coming home parties, backyard BBQ’s, fancy dinners, baptisms, pumpkin carving get togethers, all couples (but me of course) drunk fests, birthday parties, anniversary parties, engagement parties, etc., etc. ad nauseam into infinity. Yeah!
Friends and Family: Juuuuuuuust fine. I did manage to have myself removed from my Mormon Aunt’s super conservative forward e-mail list so that’s rad.
So there you have it! See what a difference a year can make? Like sands through an hourglass, these are the days of our lives. Now excuse me, I’ve got a vat of wine to drink so I can forget the depressing State of my Union.