It’s a double trouble T Saur update Thursday. Lucky, lucky you!
The on again, off again relationship between T and his lady is once again back off! When he took her back for the second (third?) time, I gave it two weeks, max. Due to the fact that I am not only awesome and smart and sexy, I am also always right. (It’s a blessing and a curse!) Anywhoos, he broke the news to me on Tuesday. I don’t really remember all of the details because I was busy playing Doodle Jump (!) on Billy Mays, but I remember hearing something along the lines of Saturday, dinner, Cha Cha’s, blah blah, couch, Sunday morning. Once I zoned back in he told me he had even gone so far as defriending her on Facespace. I told him kudos on the defriending. It’s a bold move, but an effective one! I took a mental health day yesterday but was informed by vigilant coworkers that he wrote her a Dostoevskyesque email yesterday from his yahoo (ha!) email account. He crafted it for hours. Today another vigilant coworker spied him staring at pictures of the two of them he took when they went to the Chesterfield zoo (wha?). Clearly T is completely and totally insane. I predict they are back together all over again by the weekend only to break up once more. But don’t worry, y’all know I’ll keep you informed!
How does one delicately request for your (male) coworker to start wearing a bra? I think the constant heart ache and diet consisting solely of coffee and Bugles has finally caught up to him. His man boobs are positively pornorific and are grossing me the hell out. He walks to work and when he gets here his gross ass polo shirt is covered in sweat and it makes me want to puke hard. I’m thinking of seeking professional help in permanently removing my olfactory senses.