It's OK, I don't know what any of that is, either.

Foodie (noun).  A made up word one pretentiously calls oneself to let you know they eat food better than you.  Those who use this word in a non-ironic manner alert everyone they are going to talk about the meal they prepared last night in excruciating detail, much to the disdain of those around them.  For example:

Foodie: “I prepared the most amazing lamb shank last night with a fantastic ginger and cilantro rub. Although you would think the ginger and cilantro would fight against each other, the tenderness and gaminess of the lamb really helped blend the flavor profiles beautifully.  I even paired it with a fantastic seasonal IPA I found at this new market around the corner.  Definitely making that again around holidays. Plus also, ceviche.”

You: (Blank Stare). “Oh. Ok.”

Foodies spend an abnormal portion of their free time talking about “the best” of any and every type of food.  Which restaurant has the best Cuban sandwich? Where can you find the best crab benedict asparagus breakfast burrito omelet?  How about the best Thai-Korean-Ethiopian taco truck?  Whereas there is no end to discovering the “best of” any type of consumable good, for some reason that is beyond comprehension, coffee and pizza seem to be the holy grail of “best of”.  Foodies, if left to their own devices, would talk about coffee and pizza 92-93% of the time, with the remaining 8-7% spent discussing next spring’s vegetable garden. 

When one encounters a foodie, it is best to simply nod your head and heartily agree with all of their recommendations and concur that is next to impossible to find a decent tuna tartare in this god damn town, but yes, that new Ugandan place down the street is going to be the best thing to happen to restaurants in the history of the world.


10 thoughts on “Foodie

  1. The foodie image you’re crafting here is a pretty specific stereotype. The high-brow epicurean irks me too. But, food hobbyists are a pretty diverse bunch and we often have few interests in common… except that pizza and coffee thing. You’re right, and I do it. We love those topics. But, that’s actually a good thing, because at least pizza and coffee are popular food culture fare. We talk about those two topics so that we can relate to non-foodies and then segue into our decision about where to go for lunch. At that point, an anti-foodie (not you, of course) will suggest someplace that has a cute bartender, or sports on multiple screens (I usually ask if we can compromise on a place that has free chips and salsa).

    At any rate, I’ve got lots to say about the foodie label and recently too up the issue on my blog:

    By the way, I make a really good “crab benedict asparagus breakfast burrito omelet.”

  2. As I was reading your blog, I was eating the last of my homemade vegetarian broccoli cheddar soup. I toasted a few slices of freshly baked sourdough and added some smoked cheddar on the top to melt! I loved the hint of saffron I added on a whim and the heartiness of the broccoli chunks and locally grown organic carrot. Yum! Oh right, anyway, great post! I hate foodies!

  3. Haha, I love this post. I do consider myself a “foodie”… but I like to keep my opinions to myself. I was acutally told once that I’m not a “real foodie” because I don’t blog about what I eat every day or tell the world where the BEST this or that is, haha. But I just like to seek out really unique, interesting foods (NOT pizza or coffee) on my own time and talk about it with my husband, who does the same. And I like being that kind of foodie!

  4. Making fun of foodies is like making fun of people who cos-play at anime conventions.

    BTW, you’re totally right. You need to go to Queens to get decent Ugali, but the tuna tartare options aren’t bad, especially, the sushi places. Osaka on River Road would be your best bet. Just not on Mondays. Chef Tsui is such an artist with yellowtail. And, finally, Bleach really jumped the shark during the Bount filler arc.

  5. Cooking with cilantro doesn’t make you a Foodie… But not cooking with cilantro makes you completely boring and incapable of being discriminating with your own tastes… kind of like the kind of person who only drinks pbr.

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