Ya’Sou! It’s that time of year again ladies and germs. Yep, that’s right. The Greek Festival. It’s one of the few times a year that people from the West End and Southside come into the city and get their culture on.
For the unsuspecting first timer it can be overwhelming so below are some useful tips and tricks for having a blast and getting blasted:
1-Go to a friend’s house within walking distance. Parking is going to be a bitch and trust, it’s better to hit up a buddy that lives close by and use them for their location. They won’t mind. As a matter of fact, they’ll eat that shit up and be all, “Oh of course you can meet here. I love living this close to everything. It’s really what living in the city is all about”.
2-Pregame. Heavily. You’re going to want to have a decent buzz before you arrive so things like long lines, ginormous baby strollers and running into exes don’t seem like a stain, but a part of the experience.
3-Bring Cash. Ancient Greeks didn’t accept debit and neither do they.
4-Divide and Conquer.
Have one friend who doesn’t mind sitting alone awkwardly for 30-40 minutes find a place to sit. Pick the person with an iPhone or Blackberry so they can internets and look busy instead of lonely.
Another will need to get in line for the wine-this is the most important job so give it a trustworthy friend who doesn’t mind cutting lines.
Yet another will need to grab some eats. I like gyros in case you were wondering.
If you have a spare friend then they can wander amongst the crowd and check to see if there are any attractive guys there (this will be my job, btw).
Follow these four little gems and you’re guaranteed fun and maybe even some Greek inspired sexy times. And you know how they do! OPA!!!!!!!!!
Café Darkness 
i will admit that i am a greek fest virgin in that i have never done more than walk by this festivus and i never joined a sorority. i have both an ipod and a blackberry, but will be the trusted line-cutter tonight.